Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I go from Humbly Greatful to Grumbly Hateful in 3.5 secs.

ggggggRRRRRRRRRR mateys.

So, I haven't had a decent meal since Bob and Shelley's. It's 25 degrees out (17 with windchill factor), and I have no clothes that are warm enough for my cold urticaria. And I don't have my meds for it, so I have to find a store. ( I should see if I can find a trial for cold urticaria while I'm here. I already basically share a room with Jim and Larry) I have to go shopping also because I have gained now 20 pounds since last september and I don't fit into anything. I wake up 1.5 hours earlier today, because I AM BRILLIANT AND I AM GOING TO BE THE ONE TO GET THE HOT SHOWER TODAY... cause the cold ones, well...they just don't work for me, and they make the cold urticaria hurt more. And the water temp is worse. There is no warm. So, I can't go back to sleep, so I do laundry, and the machine breaks on me, this is only after the toilet handle fell off....after I used it of course. So, I take the back off to flush it by hand and drop my only clean bra in the toilet. After I scoop that up, I go to the kitchen for coffee, and the plumber is still working on the kitchen clog. GOOD THING THE GRAND PIANO IN THE PARLOR IS WORKING.

Seriously. All these minor things, and I'm moaning. It's unbelievable how fleshy I can get so quick. And this place is beautiful and free. Who cares that I can't shower. Okay enough of that. Did I mention I'm lonely as heck. Bored, too? I went to a craft class and chose a stocking. I sat on the needle last night. That was fun.

Oh, and Larry, our beloved Larry, the roommate. Not only is he on the phone CONSTANTLY, but he must knows 100's of people that hide from him, and he calls them all and tells them the same story over again. Me and Jim are about dying now, cause we can repeat verbatim what he's going to say next, including all the hmms and hawws that go with it. The curtain separates the two of them, and we lip sync all the stories. Even the same jokes... We can repeat them. And get this...THEY'RE WORSE THAN THE BALDAUFF JOKES. I think Jim was spoiled by the private room the other 15 hopt. trips. And you know, it's good that he's not in a private room anymore. We need to be stretched and uncomfortable in all ways, I guess.

Kimmer, he's from Philly. Tell me the Italians from Philly are different. :) I could use a good piasano about now. :) He's really a nice guy, despite the, the, the....he's really a nice guy. Sister Kim, he reminds me of Walt Shine.

Okay enough about me. Let's talk about Jim. Wasn't this blog originally about him? LOL. Anyway, I talked to the doc yesterday and found this out. The cancer has gone into his vertebre. It's not a "bone cancer" but it is in his bones in his back. It's also crushing a muscle. And it's about 10 inches long. His left side on the front of him is distended (I think that's the word) and I bet that Jim's spleen is swollen from this cancer. I knew this was aggressive, but I never thought it would go from 5 cm to 10 inches within 2 weeks. So, we got him here in the nick of time. Now, it must work. More than likely, it's probably in his bone marrow, since it's in his bone, but then maybe not. But the doc says that none of this matters in regards to whether this regimen would work for him or not. If this works, it will work despite the stage. It just can't be in the brain or spinal fluid and it's not. We won't know for a while, as this works slower than the types of chemo, but if Jim's pain gets less within the next 3 weeks, that's a good sign. We come back in 21 days, after we leave here. Anybody up for a road trip? I know a great place with nice hot showers.

Well, they have Jim's pain meds upped again, and he has about 15 pounds of water in his legs. Poor guy.

Well, after shopping, I'm going over to see my Jumbo, and Larry of course. I need to hear what words of wisdom he has today. Here's what I gleaned yesterday. Larry likes the stripper joints, but his dad doesn't. He gets off the phone and tells me that he hopes Obama doesn't blow it and do something immoral. You see, he was going to vote for Edwards. And he can't believe that Edwards cheated on his wife. Especially since she was sick with cancer. (I guess only healthy wives should be cheated on.) Anyway, what kind of guy does that, Larry wants to know. Larry says that he has never cheated on a woman. He's never been with one long enough to cheat. Hmmm... He tells me that Mrs. Edwards has been spotted WITHOUT her wedding ring. Someone needs to tell Mrs. Edwards to hide, that Larry is watching. LOL.

Okay. Well, my mini pity party is over. Perhaps I'll even buy someone a Christmas gift today. Although I can't imagine that I would remember what is on anybody's list. I think I'll buy Jim some fishing tackle. That'll make him get better quicker than anything I know of. :)

Well, I'm done jumping all over the place for today. I am going to see if the water has warmed up any.

I love you guys
Thanks for reading my ramblings. It makes me feel like I'm not alone down here.

8 comments:

Rachel said...

Good morning dearest friend! I wish I had an extra couple hundred bucks (and Gary had a home office to take care of the kids) so that I could fly up and stay with you during Jim's next treatment. Wouldn't that be great? We could catch up on the past eleven years! I just realized that I'll never be able to come to PA without the kids (and much more expense) because of Gary not having a home office......:-(
Anyway, your people stories cracked me up and made me go crazy at the same time. I think you are handling it with much more control of the spirit than I would, particularly given the very difficult situation that you are in. When we are the most raw in our emotions is when its the spirit and ONLY the spirit within us that can deal with such things.
No offense to the French but I've heard nothing but that type of errogant story about them. Sorry all you french people. Get over yourself! Give me Spain or Italy any day. Those are the "romance" countries that I would love to be a part of. (Mexico too!)
Well my friend I can relate to your weight gain. I didn't want to admit it but I have gained 20 pounds too. Between a lot of emotional turmoil within my family and starting through menopause, my weight went a little loopy. Just recently have I felt more balenced but I hear you with the discouragement about it all. Maybe we can encourage each other.
Well, speaking of weight, I need to get to the gym. I love you! When are you all heading home?
love you bunches!
Rach
PS. are you able to read or is your brain too fried (and too distracted by your roommate) to be able to concentrate? I hear there's a great on-line book on grace posted on this dear ladies blog site! ;-) love ya

k2shine said...

Ok now ya got me laughing as if I was on that road trip with you.

Now I'm not laughing cause me and mark should be there to rub Jim's back. He liked that and we liked doing that for him.

Sister you missed my spellin in the last blog message. I type trail instead of trial LOLOL

Me and mark are going food shopping today, something at kmart too.

I went to pt today.

Dad needs some soft long underwear,(wink wink) if they have them there get him some ok. Oh see if they have allergy like benedryl for those cold bumps he gets (wink wink) oh gloves yeah hat for wittle noggin (wink wink) if ya see any dearfoam slippers yanno ones he likes he needs them too (wink wink)

ok got to go marks up and ready
I wanna call Jim's room and talk to him can we?

Rachel said...

I was reading this morning and this jumped out at me:
Deut. 33:27
The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms."
The Holy Spirit spoke it to me and I wanted to share it with you. I was told on Sunday that a dear woman in our church has been interceding diligently for Gary and me for months. I was deeply grateful and sat pondering some thing that I want to share with you. During the time that she has prayed so many situations in my life have been extremely difficult. I haven't shared nearly the extent of what I have gone through with you because of your situation. Suffice it to say, not being one to fuss about little things it has been a very painful fall. What struck me about this verse is that God has been holding me up with his everlasting arms, despite the heart wrenching pain that I have been walking through. I think I tend to feel that if God is holding me up that I will "feel" happy and "feel" at peace and "feel" his mighty presence. What he has shown me time and time again is that without his "everlasting arms" holding me up I would have died from grief long ago, my children would be a mess, and my husband wouldn't be around. I tend to look at the feeling side and lament that no one is praying for us or that God is on vacation but this promise shows me that God is right there holding me up, even though its still excruciating. And he also showed me that even when I feel totally alone, someone may be praying for me that I didn't even know was aware of my need.
I had to share that verse with you because I know God is carrying you with his everlasting arms even though you are still in great pain.
I love you my friend!
Rach

Anonymous said...

Heh you, you are allowed to grumble. You seem to be doing admirably at catching yourself. I'm sure that's the Holy Spirit in you. --You really made me laugh with your descriptions of what's going on. Thank You. There are so many sobering things going on in the lives of people I really love that it's great to laugh . I'm home from the dentist and my new dental work is complete yeah!!! I'm on pain meds and an antibiotic for about 5days so I'm good.Love to you and keep those stories coming. MJB

Unknown said...

Rach: sorry about your weight gain. But we encouraged each other last time, so let's get with it. Great scripture, too..

K, got your message too late about Dad's needs. :) And about your trail/trial, read new post.

MJ, glad to hear you came through the dental crisis and that all is well and we'll be seeing that pretty smile soon, we hope.

:)

Anonymous said...

Now, on a personal note, this is why my husband gets worked up about his name...he says only goofballs end up with the name Larry.

However, I stand up for Pittsburgh Larry in spite of the evidence against him in Maryland! :-)

Thinking of you, and still praying!

Love,
K

Anonymous said...

by the way, what is it with you and the potty? First, the netipot...then your bra...

Is this some kind of disorder we should be looking into? Maybe you can do a little research in your spare time :-)

Love,
me

Mary said...

Wow - unbelievable what you've been thru.

You can't find these kinds of stories in books, TVs or movies.

Incredible

I love you guys a lot and I'm reading every step of the way.

Praying for and expecting a miracle!

Mary